Just trying to be thankful...

Once upon a time, almost 12 years ago, we decided maybe we really did want kids. And so we started planning and praying and trying. Six months later still no pregnancy, One year not pregnant. Lots of friends with new bundles me still not pregnant. Two years no baby, Three years. Maybe this wasn't meant to be. But I didn't stop praying, I prayed, and prayed, and cried, and prayed, and begged, and bartered and most of all I prayed.

Then after we sold our house, put our belongings in storage, both quit our jobs, Dave left to go Active Duty and I moved in with my parents until we found out where our first duty station would be. I found out I was expecting! After 10 excruciating months of non stop all day and night sickness, our little red headed bundle arrived. She was everything I dreamed of and prayed for.

We knew we wanted more than one child, and since it took forever to get pregnant the first time, we thought maybe we should keep trying. Months and years passed, but I had Mikah to keep me occupied and even though it hurt and was my hearts desire, waiting was not nearly as hard with a toddler running you ragged.

After Four long years, of more tear, prayers, pleading, Dr. apts, prayers, invasive surgeries, we became pregnant with Ava, who has kept me on my toes since the very beginning. She decided to hang out for 42 and a half weeks and continued to kick and punch the entire birth process.... that was my sign. This little spit fire is one of the most adorable creatures I could ever imagine.

 We were not, not trying when we found out we were pregnant with Titus. He did come as a complete shock, because I really didn't think we were capable of having children without help, but apparently my body just needed to mature to 30 before it got it?I prayed for each of my children every singe day I was pregnant, I prayed for their health, for their strength and mainly for God's will in their lives. I prayed that we would be God honoring parents and examples to our children and in general I prayed as every parent expecting does.

In morning bible study today we were covering Sarah laughing at the LORD when he told her she would have a son. Even after she was done menstruating and well into menopause. Her response? "After I have grown old, shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?" (Gen 18:12)

I say all this to say this... My day has sucked! Ava has been whiny and clingy, she woke up from her nap a veritable toddler monster. Titus is cutting a bunch of teeth and is a drooly, vomiting, generally unhappy baby today. (He's normally awesome) Ava has played with toothpaste, scissors, shaving cream, hand lotion, fed Titus plastic, got into the dog food, been ask multiple time "WHERE ARE YOUR PANTS!?" and in general tried her hardest to drive me to drink. Mikah came home from school, and does not remember if she has home work. She asks me the same questions over and over and is slightly annoying the tar out of me. We have an open house to meet Mikah's new teacher tonight and Sesame Street LIVE to attend, so I'm slightly stressing about that, especially since my husband is off saving the world and not answering his phone.

But thankfully this morning's topic sticks with me, because not only are these bugger filled gnomes one of the greatest blessings of my life, they are my pleasure. If I relax, calm down and stop thinking of them as getting in my way and think of them as what they are, Answered Prayers. I can remember that I once asked, begged, pleaded and bartered with God for them, and He decided in His sovereignty to allow me (and Dave) to raise and teach these little prayer requests. Sometimes a clean house can wait and dishes can be dirty another day, so I can just hold them, or play with them, or color with them, and appreciate them.